A Long Overdue Thank You

Almost 30 years ago a lonely and fearful 14 year old girl walked into a big-o-church with a secret hope that she would find what her heart had been longing for...home.  On that night so much more happened. In the months to follow her WHOLE life would be completely changed.  Months turned into years and years into decades....and over that time, she found that her hopes and dreams were all held by her Savior who LOVED her fully, and had a good plan for her life.  He had far above anything she could dare to dream planned for her...and she blossomed.  There were so many people at her new home that loved her simply because she needed to be loved and they knew her Savior as well, and He teaches us to love others.  So many people that invested in her growth, who discipled her, and encouraged her to trust God completely.  People who rejoiced in her joy, held her in hurt, cleaned her home, cooked her family meals, gave gifts so graciously that she was often moved to tears at the great love of her Heavenly Father.  Through great joy and deep sorrow she never again traveled alone.  God saw fit to bless her with her husband, Tim....I don't think I could ever put into words how very grateful I am for this man who demonstrates selfless love and faithfulness and who has seeks God's will for our family and when my faith is weak, he stands in the gap.  Oh how thankful I am that God set us apart for each other.  God also saw fit to bless her with four sweet blessing to hold and cherish and teach to trust God fully because He is fully trustable, and that He loves them with a crazy love!  I take that responsibility very seriously.  She isn't perfect, but she is perfectly loved.  It would take her  life time of thank you to thank all who have touched her life.  However, there are moments like today, when she gets to see her son, Josh, lead in worship through song and she is moved to begin to say thank you.  First Baptist Family, thank you!  Thank you for being willing to make sacrifices, to teach, to encourage, and pray with and for a fearful and lonely 14 girl who desperately needed it.  Your investment has had eternal impact.  That 14 year old girl  is now a 42 year old mom who is fully aware of the path her life could have taken had you not loved God enough to love her!    As I listened to Josh today I was moved to tears.  I looked around and saw faces of those who played a role first my life and then his.  THIS is the difference Christ makes!  A church is not a building, it is people...imperfect people!who are willing to do whatever it takes to show Gods perfect love to the broken, discarded, lonely, fearfully people that God loves so much He sent His Son to die for!!!!  My heart longs to shout THANK YOU.  I am forever changed, eternally grateful, and absolutely determined to show His love to whomever God puts in my life.  I love my church!!!  If you are searching for home...you might just find it at FBC💗💞💜

Fixing my Focus...again😁

Now when Joab saw that the battle was set against him in front and in the rear, he selected from all the choice men of Israel and they arrayed themselves against the Arameans. But the remainder of the people he placed in the hand of Abshai his brother; and they arrayed themselves against the sons of Ammon. He said, "If the Arameans are too strong for me, then you shall help me; but if the sons of Ammon are too strong for you, then I will help you. Be strong, and let us show ourselves courageous for the sake of our people and for the cities of our God; and may the Lord do what is good in His sight."
1 Chronicles 19:10‭-‬13 NASB

Oh how thankful I am for fellow believers that I can trust to fight with me.  Life is tough!  We get busy, overwhelmed, discouraged and sometimes feel defeated.  There are times when the battle before seems too hard, and we need to know back up is there.  God in His loving grace gave us friends who are willing to fight with us, and who are willing to watch out for us and help us if we fall.

Mom Friend, please know that the battle set before you today is not one you face alone.  First, God is with you, His thoughts are on you.  He loves and equips you for this day and all of its struggles.  Secondly, you have fellow friends who have been, are, or will be right where you are today.  Let them encourage, pray for, and fight with you today.  You don't have to have it all together!  You don't have to have all the answers!  You don't have to battle alone!

Sometimes we get discouraged and so focused on the mundane that we miss the marvelous.  Yes life is getting up early  or staying up late...sometimes both , cleaning, laundry, cooking,laundry, grocery shopping, laundry, driving, laundry, baking, with the occasional load of laundry😁.   But life is also filled with grace, and strength to accomplish those task.  Don't let the task drown out the ones who benefit from those task.  We are so blessed with children and our husbands.  Time will pass quickly, live with as few regrets as possible, stay focused on what is important.  Release yourself from any guilt that the enemy tries to put on you, because you didn't  __________, or because you aren't _________.  Find a fellow mom today and say to her, hey I'm here for you and if you fall I will help you up.  I've got your back!  Pray for each other and be real with each other.  Our enemy wants us to think we are alone, but we are not!

  Forgive yourself for yesterday's blunders, after all they are covered by grace, and release yourself to walk in freedom of  this new mercy filled day.  Start your day with The Lord, read His word, and pray all throughout your day.  He doesn't call us without equipping us.  Take a deep breathe, and one step.  Repeat.  This is a new and beautiful day, don't let the enemy steal your peace and joy today.  It isn't his.....it is your gift from your loving Father who has set this day before you as an opportunity to walk more closely with Him.

I am NOT perfect!

I'd like to take a few minutes to share my heart with you.  I am NOT perfect...and this might shock you......neither are you.  AND THAT'S OK!!!  

This is a current picture of my couch.  If I'm being completely honest , it usually looks like this.  I could give you  more picture of the imperfections in my cleaning abilities, however that's not what this post is about.  This post is about learning to live a life smothered in grace and overflowing with peace.  Please know that chaos makes me absolutely crazy.  I can't really think or function in chaos.   I am a perfectionist, but I'm not very good at it😱.  For years this has been a source of great discouragement for me.  I always feel just a tad bit inadequate as I measure myself against other women God placed in my life.  I take their best attributes and make a super woman that I measure myself against.  Here, let me show ya how this works......

My sister Alisha is amazing at organization and if you ever have the pleasure of being a guest in her home she will make you feel like royalty

My sister Cammie is the kindest, most gentle person I know.  If you have the blessing of knowing her, you feel loved and completely wanted.

My sister Amy, can just roll with the flow!  Nothing and I mean nothing ruffles her feathers!

My sister Lori sees beauty and joy in all things.  She is quick to laugh and you must join her....she just pulls you in!

My sister Amanda is amazing at making her home beautiful and welcoming.  She's the person who can take blue, orange, and green objects and make a room fit for a magazine cover.  She is a great problem solver...she can just see a clear solution.

My sister Kara is a very determined lady.  She is strong and confident.  She sees what she wants and makes it happen.

My other sister Amanda is so incredible thoughtful!  She is generous and loving and so sweet, she is great at making others in her life feel loved.

NOW THESE ARE JUST A FEW LADIES IN MY LIFE and I didn't ask any if them before I included them ....but they have to forgive me because they're family and stuck with me😁

I have seen each of these precious ladies in very difficult circumstances.  I have seen them not at their best and I still completely believe I am better and blessed for having them in my life.  Here's something I have come to realize.  I would NEVER focus on or share things about my sisters that would caused you to think poorly of them.  I know they are not perfect... And so do they.  They don't need me to point out their flaws.  They see them clearly I'm sure.   

So back to how I build my super woman model.  I take all these true things about my sisters and make a list of my short comings and the comparing begins....

I'm not very organized...like Alisha,  I focus of task instead of people too often...Cammie doesn't ,  I often get upset when things get hard...not like Amy,  I let the mess destract me from the beauty...unlike Lori, my home is usually a mess...not like Amanda, I am rarely focused...unlike Kara, I forget birthdays and anniversaries...not like Amanda.  Compared to my super model I never measure up!  I fall short each time!  I allow the enemy to convince me that I am not enough, and never will be.

Soooooooooo, I feel defeated and discouraged because of this way of thinking.  So I've made a decision, I'm not keeping my imperfection secret anymore.

I DONT HAVE IT ALL TOGETHER, I AM A MESS SOMETIMES, MY HOME IS OFTEN LESS THAN SPOTLESS, AND I'M FORGETFUL!

BUT.....

IM ALSO A MOM OF FOUR SWEET BLESSINGS, A WIFE TO ONE TERRIFIC GUY,   A LOVED SISTER, DAUGHTER, COUSIN AND FRIEND, I AM A TEACHER, AND A DAUGHTER OF the KING OF kings AND LORD OF lords.

And.....I believe being real and transparent is a blessing to those I have in my life.  

...and she was a wise and beautiful women ....1Samuel 25:3

This is the legacy I want to leave.  A life lived  that testifies to wisdom and beauty.

 I'm not talking about the makeup, hair and clothes beauty.  I'm talking about the deep down.. love Jesus and others.. beauty.  The kind that makes our eyes shine and our smile sweet. One that doesn't fade as life gets hard, but grows brighter because God has seen us through yet another dark valley.  A beauty that reflects The Creator of all things beautiful.  A beauty that tells your story...His story.  A beauty that is filled with winkles, stretch marks and gray hairs...inner beauty.  A beauty that is developed by spending time in prayer and listening to The Holy Spirit's whispers, and follows by faith.  A beauty that comes from walking an uncomfortable path because that's where Jesus leads. A beauty that comes from entering deep waters only to be washed cleaned by The Master's grace.  A beauty that isn't limited by or connected to the size of my jeans.    A beauty that teaches that God is good, even when life is bad.  A beauty that my daughters will see and desire for herself.  A beauty that finds purpose in pointing others to Christ as Lord and Savior   A beauty that is covered in grace and walks with mercy everyday.   A beauty that extends to those who feel discarded a hope that can only be found in Christ.  A beauty that screams to the mom that feels like a failure, truth that a bad day doesn't make you a bad mom.  A beauty that encourages those who are in a sad season, to remember seasons change, and this one won't last forever.  A beauty that sings God's praises in the midst of the rain.  A beauty that is ready to point those who have lost their way to the hope that lies within me, Christ.  A beauty that is unending, and ever-changing. A beauty that is pressed into all the cracks of my brokenness by The Potter, for I am only clay. A beauty that comes from ashes, refined and repurposed to serve God alone.

This is the beauty I want to display on a daily bases to my husband, four blessings, family and friends and complete strangers.  A beauty that points straight and true back to the giver of this beauty, Christ.

I know that I will not do this perfectly, but that's part of this beauty.  I am not EVER going to be perfect on this earth, but The One who is perfect has clolthed me in His righteousness and I am perfectly His!  Because of the righteousness of Christ I can go boldly before the throne of The Most High as His daughter!  What an amazing gift of beauty.  When God looks at me through Jesus He sees beauty!  He sees His child wanting to spend time with Him and it's beautiful!

So dear sweet friend, begin to look at yourself as God sees you.  Stop defining yourself by the worlds standards.  Allow Christ to free you from those chains that bind you.  Rest in His presence and be forever changed! 

Belonging to Him for
Ever.
Abiding with Him,
United by
The
Incredible
Forgiveness and
Undeserved yet,
Lavished love of The Most High

If you are His, you are BEAUTIFUL!

Place of Refuge

In Joshua 20, God's word teaches that there were cities of refuges set up specifically for those who had accidently with out malice killed someone.  A place for them to flee and be free from the revenge of anyone.  A safe place.  Today as I skimmed thru my journal a thought occurred to me.  This was a beautiful picture of God's mercy.  He made clear rules regarding taking someone's life, then He provides a place of grace.  Can you imagine the guilt you'd feel after accidently taking the life of someone else?  Can you imagine the brokenness that must consume?

  God in His absolute love, is still in the business of providing a place of healing for those who find themselves broken.  Sometimes we are wounded by the acts of another and we find ourselves surrounded by people who cheer for us, and minister to us as we heal.  Other times we find ourselves broken by our own actions, and there is a tendency to have a "well, you made your bed" mindset, and we can feel completely alone.

  However, in Joshua 20, I see that God provides a place of healing for the second group!  These people made a bad decision and the result was terrible.  And yet, God lovingly provided a safe place of healing for them.  A place that had people who truly understood the path you were facing as they had walked it.  A place where your pain and sin was clear, and yet you could find rest and peace and comfort.  A place where people understood clearly that mistakes can cost much and burdens are heavy.

  We no longer have actual places of refuge,  instead we have a Person of refuge.  God's word say that "God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble Psalms 46:1"  He is the one we run to and find strength and help.  Even when we have caused the mess we find ourselves in!  I am so thankful that the goodness of God isn't dependent on the goodness of me.  God's love for me is not changed by my actions or decisions.  God's faithfulness is steadfast and long suffering.  There is nothing I can do that will cause God to not love, because He IS love.

 The problem is sometimes we think if you love someone you let them do whatever they want and protect them from any bad consequences.  THIS IS NOT LOVE!  This is enabling someone to stay on a path that leads to destruction.  Love doesn't lead to destruction.  Love leads to truth, healing and forgiveness and restoration.  God is a redeeming God, who searches long and watches intently for those who are His. 

I am so thankful for the love of my Heavenly Father and for the people He has placed in my life that teach me of His love.  My husband, Tim, has taught me much about this kind of love.  He had the privilege of growing up in a Christ centered home where this love was lived out daily.  Where being a Christian was not something set aside for Sunday but lived out daily.  A place that wasn't perfect, but grace flowed.  And I am blessed because he has brought this into our marriage and home.  He does a great job of reflecting the love of God on his family and friends. 

Blessed beyond belief and absolutely blown away the great love of my God!

Seeing Truth.......Filled with Joy!

I try very hard to remember that NO person is perfect.  NO person!  Not a single one!  Including, my kids.  They aren't perfect, but they are priceless treasures!  I am so thankful for the is journey of being a mama.  Not just a mama, THEIR mama!  It moves me to tears to think that God allows me to be a mama.  I love that in Him I can do this job well.  I take this responsibility very seriously.  I know that I have a few short years to invest in their lives, and I want to invest well.  It isn't easy, but TOTALLY worth it!

My days are filled with repeated task and words.  My nights are sometimes filled with wake-up calls and staying up late to make sure they home safe and sound.  It isn't glamorous, but it is glorious!  It isn't monumental, but it is meaningful!  It isn't always blissful, but always beautiful!  It is my favorite job ever!  It is hard!  It is tough!  It is tedious!  It is painful!  It is COMPLETELY WORTH IT!

I believe that God knows this job of being a parent isn't easy. Since He loves us with an endless, undying, perfect love He encourages as we walk this journey.  Today this happened to me again.  Little glimpses of understanding, that all those repeated words and task pay off.  Our kids hear, and see and learn.  And, it is BEAUTIFUL!

"I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth. 3John 1:4"

Today God allowed me a glimpse of this joy!  I went to our children and shared my heart.  It was regarding being obedient with a good attitude.  It was a teaching moment.  It was repeated words, spoken with the hopes of truth sinking deep into to their hearts.  It was TRUTH, it was necessary, not exactly pleasant, but as a mama I knew it needed to be said.  And, they listened, and it was BEAUTIFUL!

A few minutes later, one of those blessings came to me and said, "mama, I am sorry for how I treated you when you told me to do something at the pool." And then later in his prayer he prayed and asked God to help them all obey without complaining.  And, I blinked away tears of pure joy and this verse, that I had hidden in my heart came to mind.

"I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth. 3John 1:4"

God word is completely true, there is NO greater joy!  NONE! 

Imperfect Progress.....happening now.......

"I can do all things, through Christ who strengthens me" Phil 4:13

Sometimes I forget this verse applies to everyday stuff.  In my mind I save this verse for super hard times.  I have come to the conclusion that I need this verse for the every day mundane stuff as well as the earth shattering stuff.  I had gotten so discouraged lately in my daily life that I have felt powerless and defeated.  I am learning that this verse is a daily verse, not a stick in a drawer and pull it out in the tough times verse.  I can do THIS day well, if I do this day through Christ who strengthens me!  This is the day that The Lord has made for me.  I will make a choice to walk this day in His strength.  This revelation won't make all my problems disappear, or be instantly solved.  This revelation will  allow me to see each trial as an opportunity for God to show His mighty love for me and my family.  It is my goal to have an attitude like Paul , and this truth gets me one step closer to living this life content in whatever state I find myself.  It allows me to take a deep breath and know that God is in complete control, even when I have NO answers.  I have been reminded that if I stay connected to my power source, He will supply what I need to do this day well!  I am forever grateful for God's unfailing, ever pursuing love for me!   It is my hope that if you are struggling today with unbelief that you too will be encouraged to know that God is in the business of doing the impossible! 

You are deeply loved........